making love out of nothing at all

Every time I see you all the rays of the sun
Are streaming through the waves in your hair;
And every star in the sky is taking aim
At your eyes like a spotlight,
The beating of my heart is a drum, and its lost
And its looking for a rhythm like you.
You can take the darkness from the pit of the night
And turn into a beacon burning endlessly bright.
Ive got to follow it, cause everything I know, well its nothing till I give it to you.

it's like you gotta know so much and yet you don't know so much and in life you gotta gain so much and you have so much more to lose. it's like you know what you want and then you become unsure and then you don't know at all what it was that you were waiting for.

the fluidity of life and love and death and heartbreaks. it's like we flow into one dimension and never quite leave one before we're in another and then we're in the third and fourth and there's still a little bit of your kiss in my ear.

I can make the run or stumble,
I can make the final block;
And I can make every tackle, at the sound of the whistle,
I can make all the stadiums rock.
I can make tonight forever,
Or I can make it disappear by the dawn;
And I can make you every promise that has ever been made,
And I can make all your demons be gone.

speaks volumes of what a single person can do to palpitate your heart yes my heart goes like a drum that has lost its sense of rhythm. i like how the above reflects a sports person's desire and how a girl can make you run or stumble, make the final block, make you make every tackle at the sound of the whistle and making the stadiums rock. when actually in the entire stadium, the only person who notices your run your stumbles your blocks your tackle is her. and the whole stadium rocks because of her. that single soul that smiles right into your heart.

But Im never gonna make it without you,
Do you really want to see me crawl?
And Im never gonna make it like you do,
Making love out of nothing at all.

do you really want to see me crawl?

i am nothing without you

to my dearest sky:

i will always be right here...
and you'll never need to fall(:

xoxo,
starry night

time,
how much time do i have before things begin to fall apart? how much time do i need before i realise what it all means to me? how much time do i want to have?

hanging by a thread, knowing that in a split second, i'll be falling into a bottomless black hole. unable to climb up again. without help. without anyone or anything.

原来最疼痛的表情竟是没有情绪
原来最残忍的画面可以甜言蜜语

原来最孤单的是我还是那么想你
原来最悲哀的是我不能面对自己

你试著放手
心让他带走
你给的爱
毫无保留

他不适合你
你以为你是真的爱过
若他真的属于你
他不会这样狠心离去

谁没辜负谁
谁都没错
但你却伤著心
有点失落
不让泪水流
却一直说
他还是爱你

何不好好过
谁都会说
你给了一颗心
又得到什么
而这样的结束
是你最奢侈
最珍贵的收获

best thing bout tonight's that we're not fighting

you know, nowadays it's just difficult to find the words to say. maybe it just gets harder and harder, to find the right words, sift out the bad ones and forget the wrong ones. there've been times that i started typing a little here and there on this little space of mine and i stopped, backspaced everything and face the void again.

what's there to say anyway? when words are lost midway into the abyss of thoughts. thoughts that threaten to consume me. eat away at me bit by bit until i'm finished. and by the time i jolt out of that state of consciousness, i no longer know what to say. bit by bit i forget what i wanted to say in the first place. what's the point of saying anything. what's the point anyway?

and here i am with my pocky-flavoured breath, wondering if there's anything to look forward to tomorrow. it's good friday. yeah. tgif. but. what's so good about it anyway? what's so good about it? i have no more pocky left to get me through the night.

i can't wait to get this over and done with. i hate to study for the sake of exams. i hate to read for the sake of knowing them only to regurgitate them. but i kinda enjoy what i am doing because they speak volumes of my mind my heart my soul my consciousness the existence of my being the very reason why i am even borne into this world.

but i hate it because exams are looming.

and i retreat back into my lifeless shell. where nothing. nothing can move me to say anything. where no one. no one can throw any weight onto my shoulders. where there's nothing. nothing at all. a solitude that welcomes me with the widest of open arms.

because i am too afraid of unwelcome solitude.

because i am too afraid to fall or fail.

because i am too afraid to lose sight of the shore and seek greater oceans.

because tonight will be the night
that i will fall for you
over again
don't make me change my mind
or i won't live to see another day
i swear it's true

it's impossible to find.

could it be that we have been this way before...

好想好想和你在一起
和你一起数天上的星星
收集春天的细雨

好想好想和你在一起
听你诉说古老的故事
细数你眼中的情意

好想好想
好想好想
好想好想和你在一起
踏遍万水千山
走遍海角天涯
让每一个日子
都串连成我们最美丽
最美丽的回忆

the last day of my life

I just left Bobby's house:
The service was today.
Got me thinkin' about how fragile life is,
As I drove away.
You know Amy was his only love,
In a moment she was gone, long gone:
It could have been me or you.
Oh, baby, there's no time to lose.

So I'm gonna bring home a dozen roses,
An' pour us a glass of wine.
An' I'm gonna put on a little music,
An' turn down the lights.
An' I'm gonna wrap my arms around you,
An' rock you all through the night,
An' I'm gonna love you,
Like it's the last day of my life.

I drive off when the sun comes up:
I get back when it's gone down.
There's so much I wanna do with you,
But I can't be around.
Whoa, time has been just like a thief,
It's stolen too much from us,
So once it's gone we can't make it up.
So tonight, let's get back in touch.

Life is a rainbow, it's a spring snow,
It's the mornin' dew.
An' I don't wanna waste another minute,
Without you.

behind blue eyes

No one knows what it's like
To be the bad man
To be the sad man
Behind blue eyes
And no one knows
What it's like to be hated
To be fated to telling only lies

But my dreams they aren't as empty
As my conscience seems to be
I have hours, only lonely
My love is vengeance
That's never free

No one knows what its like
To feel these feelings
Like i do, and i blame you!
No one bites back as hard
On their anger
None of my pain and woe
Can show through

No one knows what its like
To be mistreated, to be defeated
Behind blue eyes
No one knows how to say
That they're sorry and don't worry
I'm not telling lies

No one knows what its like
To be the bad man, to be the sad man
Behind blue eyes.

不要你离开
距离隔不开
思念变成海
在窗外进不来
原谅说太快
爱成了阻碍
手中的风筝放太快回不来

不要你离开
回忆划不开
欠你的宠爱
我在等待重来
天空仍灿烂
它爱着大海
情歌被打败
爱已不存在

what is love but a transience,
of not knowing
of trying to guess
and not ever going to find
the right answers to
the wrong questions...

what is love
but a transience?

games will play themselves out

i think blogging happens in various states of minds. we weave through our streams of consciousness and find the words that we are losing or have lost. it's like how when you read a certain emotional entry which surfaces to be quite dramatic and the writer seems to be deeply fallen into some emotional turmoil, stop and think again. it is just a stream of consciousness. an unconscious stream of feelings that everyone have deep down inside but nobody really knows it because it seldom surfaces. when parts of a passage strike you and evoke some feelings in you, you'll realise that deep within yourself, there lies a consciousness of deeper thoughts and emotions that you have never quite thought about or felt but they've always existed within you.

there have been instances that my mind rolls back and forth back and forth and fuses into a state of confusion where the line is so blur that i can't even tell that it's a line anymore. i take my pain and retreat into it, seeking comfort in feeling the vast emotions that surge through me like an electric current. high voltage but not strong enough to kill me. but parts of me begin to die away. and die away again another day.

reality gnaws at me like a worm that eats its way out of the core of an apple. but for me it's eating its way inside. tearing me up like worthless rags. a heart made up of paper cuts.

how much it hurts to see the tears that glisten in your eyes and they unknowingly fall into my lap only for me to realise that my eyes are overflowing too.

how much it pains me to see the unfamiliar eyes fill with a certain amount of fear. i feel your trembles and i feel it in my heart.

i know, but i can't stop it.

games will play themselves out...

when will it be,
game over?